Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Physician by Osmosis

The Zionsville Fire trucks ran through the neighborhood tonight with Santa on top. The kids all congregated on the corner and enjoyed watching Santa whiz along.

A friend called tonight. She wanted medical advice from me (not my physician husband). I'd find the call odd if it hadn't happened so many times before. Quite frequently, I'm the recipient of a call from a friend seeking medical advice. All phoning friends are well aware that I hold no medical licenses nor any degrees even remotely related to the medical career. In fact, I had to pray my way through each and every science course I was forced to complete.

Nonetheless, I suppose these friends think I should have learned a thing or two about medicine after being married to a physician for over a decade. As the marriage ages, does a spouse earn a physician degree by osmosis? That seems to be the theory.

Although my medical opinions are not backed by any degree or schooling (and Chris would be completely mortified to know I'm dispensing any sort of medical advice), I know enough to triage neighbor calls.

Bad fall?

Blackouts or vomiting?

Deep cut?

How deep and how long did it bleed?

Weird rash?

Tell me more.

Of course, the best advice I can provide:

I'd go to the ER.

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