Thursday, March 7, 2013

Praying They Get Caught

My drive to school is absolutely beautiful with the snow-covered trees.

 The boys are having so much fun in the snow. 

As much as I wanted to hate our (hopefully) last blast of winter, the snow makes everything so pretty and the boys enjoy their time playing amid the flakes.

Cooper didn't quite understand how to apply a hand warmer.  He taped it to the outside of his glove.  I couldn't stop laughing when I saw him gear up for the snow looking like this.

A friend with older boys told me she prays her sons get caught.  She said when one of her sons get "caught" in sin, she (as the parent) has the opportunity to work with the child and teach him how to respond to a situation and better react in the future.  

Although I agreed with my friend's advice, I laughed.  I don't really need to utter that prayer; my boys seem to be doing just fine getting busted for their acts of naughtiness and mischief.

But I thought about my friend's comments a few days ago and decided to include her words in my prayers.  Sure enough, that day one of my sons came home with a "Dear Dad" letter that outlined that son's antics in the classroom.  I was distraught and wondered if there was any "take backs" on prayers.  Can I say later, "I didn't really mean it?"  

It's painful to see your child "get caught."  It can be embarrassing, hard-wrenching, emotionally draining, and time-consuming.  It's certainly easier to live in a world where I child is moving along perfectly through life (even if it's only on the surface things look perfect).

But as any parent knows, easy and parenting don't often land in the same sentence.  Parenting with an eye on long-term benefits requires work and can be a laborious process in the short term.

For the situation with my son, I listened to some advice from my mother; something she pulled out from her own parenting tool bag that she used during my childhood.  She called it the "double or nothing" approach (love that my mom incorporated gambling into her parenting!).  She said the first time a child committed an "offense," she talked the child through the situation and provided guidance on how to respond better in the future.  She informed the child of the punishment she would have doled out.  Then, she told the child if they committed the same "crime" again, she would hand out twice the original punishment because at that time the child knew the act was wrong.


I used this same approach on my son.  I have to say he was very responsive.  He appreciated the grace I extended him for a "first time offense" and seemed to understand the magnitude of a second lapse in judgement.

After this situation, I'm hesitant to offer up the same "Please let them get caught" request, but I see the benefits to answered prayer.


No comments:

Post a Comment